The Second Half of Life

Sometimes Alberta switches it up with swimming, and Ron practises mindfulness meditation, which is beneficial for both mind and body.

The Altons have been married for 22 years, a second marriage for both. The couple is in many ways ahead of the groundswell of Baby Boomers determined not to recline in rocking chairs in their later years.

Without “being fanatical about it,” as Alberta points out, they’ve educated themselves about what they should do to stay in the best possible shape, and then they’ve gone out and done it.

Knowing, for example, that a good diet is a cornerstone of a healthy lifestyle, Alberta keeps up with the latest nutrition research. She loves to cook, which suits Ron, who loves to eat. “She comes up with tremendous ideas,” her husband says proudly.

Preferring not to reveal their exact ages, the Altons say only that they are well into retirement. However, they are retired only in the narrow sense of no longer working in management – he in the banking sector; she in the Children’s Aid Society. Their calendars are almost as full now as when they worked full-time. Days are packed with activities they both love, with time set aside for five grown children and 10 grandchildren, or sometimes for just doing nothing.

Recipe for a healthy retirement: keep your mind active even as your body ages, stay physically strong, and keep your friends and family close.

For intellectual stimulation, the Altons play bridge with friends – Alberta is also a long-time Mahjong player – and attend University of Toronto lectures several times a year to satisfy their abiding curiosity about the world. Recently they’ve heard talks on topics as diverse as Sotheby’s auctions, the Great Lakes, civil liberties, and maintaining bone health.

A love of theatre and music, which they share with several close friends, takes them out to the theatre and the symphony in Toronto and helps them maintain those social and cultural connections that are so important for mental health.

For their winter break, the couple just returned from a Caribbean cruise, and they plan to visit Europe later this year.

GIVING BACK
Despite the “doom and gloom” focus of some media, aging is a good experience for most seniors. Many report greater contentment and satisfaction with life in their later years. Thanks to medical advances and better lifestyles, seniors are the healthiest they have ever been in history. Not content to rest on their laurels, many seniors are busy applying a lifetime of talent and expertise to new activities. The Altons bring their combined work and life experience to the volunteer work they do today in the Palliative Care Unit at Baycrest. In fact, the couple actually met at a seminar for volunteers, when Ron was a volunteer probation officer for juveniles and Alberta was a volunteer program coordinator for the Children’s Aid Society.

Research, including a current Baycrest study, is showing that volunteering is good for the health of the volunteer. Helping to support palliative care patients and their families through a very challenging experience is not for everyone, Alberta acknowledges. She and Ron were surprised to find that they took to the work. With special training, including chaplaincy training, combined with wisdom acquired over their own long lives, they are able to give comfort to dying patients and their families.

“Often patients just want someone to talk with,” Alberta explains. “Even patients who have families who are very involved are alone at times. It is very satisfying when a patient becomes animated and their face lights up when they see you…and for families themselves, it can be comforting to have a volunteer to talk to who is not going through the same difficult experience.”

For Ron, being able to calm fears is very rewarding. “I met two young people today who were very nervous – their grandfather was in the same room as another gentleman who is dying – and I chatted with them for a while and they seemed so appreciative of that.